enthusiasm

I still feel so excited about the opportunities that have presented themselves in front of me. Even if nothing comes of this management thing, I still have this very strong feeling that things are about to change for me in a very big way. I think and feel like everything that I now know I want is really going to come together for me.

Things at the store are great. I'm still having a blast working there and I can see that it's going to continue to be so much fun. Some days I wish that things would slow down just a touch, but at the same time I know that this is job security. Although, I kinda wish people would stop telling me that. Questions/comments I'm asked/told EVERY single day:

Are you always this busy?
How have you guys been doing?
How long have you been open?
I'm so glad you're here!
Yeah, it's busy but it's job security!
I bet this is a fun place to work.
Are you hiring?
I hope this brings downtown back.
Do you know what else is opening around here?

And the list goes on. Most of the time I'm happy to answer the question for the 80,000th time but every once in awhile it gets a bit tedious. So let me set the record straight:

"The new Mast General Store in Columbia is fantastic. It IS a fun place to work, and you'd have to ask management about applying. We have been busy since day one and while it has slowed down some, we are still constantly busy. Things are going well, I don't see us leaving in the foreseeable future. Yes, other places are opening up, but I do not have any further details than that."

With that out of the way, I'm still really excited. And because a very good friend gave me some great advice, I have not been detracted from going after what I want. Yay!

lindsayallison

coming together

Have you ever felt like things started coming together all at once?

First, I got this amazing job working at Mast General Store. I have excellent pay, great coworkers, and even better: I get to have FUN at work! The company provided great training for the great products they sell. I have felt so much happier and so less stressed the past couple of months.

So the less stress at work has caused me to have the mental capacity to do some soul searching. I was able to clear my mind of so much negative energy and I was able to come up with a goal for my life.

I started writing again. Still gonna keep the current project under wraps because I don't know where it's gonna lead to. But the writing is really helping to keep me cathartic. I'm loving it.

Then two days ago happened. I had the day off, but apparently one of the managers resigned. Why she did, I don't know. But now I have this huge opportunity right in front of me. I could apply for and possibly get a management position.

This feels so...right for me. I feel like my body is humming so much with excitement and positive energy that I feel like my hands and feet are almost vibrating. It's a good feeling.

I just pray that this all isn't in my head. How could so many good, right-feeling things come together at once if it wasn't meant to be?

lindsayallison

overwhelmed

I find myself stressing out over things that have not even happened yet.

My biggest goal at the moment is to purchase my own home. I have been a renter before and I find that it is a waste of money. Why spend so much each month on a place to live when at the end of the lease you have nothing to show for it? Why not put that money towards a mortgage? Granted it takes a while, but eventually the residence becomes yours.

Step one of the goal: Save up some money while paying down debt.

Step one is well under way. What I'm stressing about now is if I'll have the money to afford a house. I keep thinking that yes, I have so much money each month that I could put towards a mortgage. And I think, yes, I can afford to have a house!

But then I think, what about the power bill? And the water bill? And the internet bill? And all of those things that I'll need to have to be in a house. Yes, I could get a roommate, but something inside of me wants so desperately to have MY house and be on my own.

Then I get discouraged.

And then I think: Why am I getting discouraged already? Shouldn't I just trust that if it's meant to be and if I work hard and smart towards my goal that it will happen?

If I think about it, it's going to take time to save up the money that I'll need for inspections and closing costs. During that time, I could pay off one of my student loans. That right there will free up $60 a month. That could be half an electric bill. Or it could be a water bill or an internet bill.

I am not giving up. I want my house. I need my house. I am 24 years old and I think I'm a little old to be dependent on others. I want to be self sufficient. I think I can do this.

Then I think: You know what would help supplement your income? Writing a book. And getting it published.

Yeah, I think I'll do that.

lindsayallison